The characters in The Wanderers are experiencing internal conflict around identity, success, and love. This leads to interpersonal conflicts with their significant others and family members. While conflict is a normal part of life and relationships, sometimes they can permanently alter your relationship with someone. The activities below explore how and why we engage in conflict.
Read the article “What Great Listeners Actually Do” by Jack Zenger and Joseph Folkman.
Think about the arguments, fights, and conversations each couple has in The Wanderers.
Think back to a conversation you had with someone who you disagreed with and got into an argument/fight about. How did you feel about it then? How do you feel about it now?
Now think back to a conversation you had with someone who you disagreed with but could talk about it without arguing/fighting or feeling bad. How did you feel about it then? How do you feel about it now?
What was different between the first conversation and the second? What made one feel like an argument/fight and the other like a disagreement you could move on from?
Recall a moment of conflict from the show. Place yourself in the shoes of one of the characters. Write a monologue you would include in this scene to change the nature of the fight to an argument. Can a resolution be reached?
Read the quotes below from Sophie and Esther.
“The day I realized I was going to marry him, we were in the car and he was reading a poem of mine aloud. A poem he’d grabbed out of my backpack, against my will. But the way he read it, with so much reverence for each word, made it sound...beautiful. And important. And I felt completely...seen.”
“You have not seen me from the moment we met. Not even once. If you had, you would not have allowed this to happen. This...destruction.”
How do they resonate with you? Is there a time where you felt completely seen? Is there a time when you felt someone you loved did not see you?
“Seen” is not an emotion, it’s a passive verb. An emotion is "a conscious mental reaction subjectively experienced as strong feeling, typically accompanied by physiological and behavioral changes in the body." Think about a time you either felt seen or unseen by a person you loved. When was it? Where were you? What was said or unsaid.
Take 5-10 minutes to write your memory of the moment. Share what emotions you felt when you wrote about the memory with a partner or small group. Using everyone’s emotions, craft a definition of what it means “to feel seen.” Physicalize this definition in a group tableau, or frozen picture.
Read “From the Archives: Do U DM?” How do you react to technology used as communication on stage, tv, or film? Do you think it supports the storytelling? How so?
What is the main form of communication you use with your friends? Why? Do you think you are able to fully express yourself, your identity, and your thoughts? Why or why not? Do you feel more comfortable speaking with people this way? Why?
Imagine a new form of communication. It can be for text, audio, or video messaging, a social media platform, or something completely new and never seen before. How would this platform let users express themselves? Create a thirty second advertisement for this new form of communication.